


The Capybara Caper

by Seakays



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Happy birthday Frumpologist, fluffy fluff, super silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:48:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27053698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seakays/pseuds/Seakays
Summary: Hopeless romantic Hermione Granger is called to wrangle two capybaras that have escaped.  Will these two rodents help her find her love at first sight?
Relationships: Sirius Black/Hermione Granger
Comments: 10
Kudos: 20





	The Capybara Caper

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Frumpologist](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frumpologist/gifts).



> This incredibly silly silliness is to honour the birthday of one of the kindest, strongest people I know. Thank you for the light you bring to everyone you meet.
> 
> Hope this makes you smile.
> 
> Unbeta’d because I am really excellent at procrastination.
> 
> Disclaimer - I own nothing of the Harry Potter franchise and make no profit whatsoever from this work.

Hermione Granger was a hopeless romantic. She swooned heavily when she learned the details of Harry’s ridiculous over the top proposal to Ginny. She wept openly during Nicholas Sparks movies, and she kept every letter anyone had ever written her in a pale green box, emblazoned with tiny, glittery gold hearts.

She was a firm and staunch believer in love at first sight, the power of the written word, and that the universe was benign enough to ensure that everyone had a perfect match. Somewhere.

But now, as time slowly marched forward towards her thirtieth birthday, her relentless positivity about love was waning just a tiny bit. 

She had been resplendent in a hot pink bridesmaid dress when Ron and Lavender wed, glowing in sage green when Harry and Ginny married, but even she had to admit she looked terribly sallow in the pale yellow Hannah and Neville had picked for their wedding last month. 

Hermione had celebrated with all her friends as they fell in love, and got married, resolute that the person for her was still out there. Lately, however, Hermione had started to wonder if he had gotten lost or waylaid on his path to her. 

Perhaps, Hermione pondered, it was partly her fault as she had not made the path to her front door easy to find. She knew she worked too much, she found blind dates an appalling waste of time, and the idea of having to mask the more quirky parts of her personality to fit some wizards preconceived notion of perfection abhorrent. 

So she worked and she waited, each day a little less sparkly about romantic love. 

It was with her lustre a little dulled that Hermione apparated to the Marauders Menagerie — a magical pet shop on the outskirts of Diagon Alley. Hermione had never covered this part of Diagon on her Auror patrols before, but with MacMillan out on his honeymoon (chocolate brown corduroy gowns, thank you very much), the call to help capture the two wayward capybaras had fallen to her more than capable hands. 

Hermione was a bit surprised to see a magical pet store stock decidedly Muggle animals, but the last decade had seen quite a marriage of Muggle and Wizarding culture. 

Dressed in her incredibly frumpy, yet highly functional creature robes, Hermione rang the Niffler shaped buzzer of the store front. A lovely

young witch answered, and gave Hermione all the particulars of the furry escapees.

Capybaras, Hermione knew, were fairly gentle rodents and relatively slow moving, but if they found water it would make capture much more challenging. Hermione was determined to corral them before that happened. 

Perhaps she had been a bit too confident in her abilities because while a quick  _ Wingardium Leviosa  _ had captured the male rodent, the female proved to be much more elusive. Hermione had to slog through two swamp-like mud puddles before finally cornering the capybara against a beaver dam. Indignant about being captured, the rodent promptly urinated all over Hermione.

So, there she was, Hermione Granger, Auror First Class, Order of Merlin, standing thigh deep in mud, covered in rodent piss, wearing her least flattering robes, when she looked up and fell.

Head over heels, starry eyed into love with the tall, ridiculously handsome wizard who held out his well calloused hand to her, laughing at her plight.

“Merlin, Doll, you look like shit. Let’s get Lola back into her enclosure. Gaston is waiting for her.”

Looking down at Lola still in her arms, Hermione tried to calm the rhythm of her rapidly beating heart.

“Sirius Black . . . So it  _ is  _ you who owns Marauders? I should have known, but I didn't think you would ever be quite so  _ obvious! _ You know, Harry misses you.”

Hermione may have just given her heart away, but she still needed answers before they chose menu options for the wedding reception.

“Hiding in plain sight, Doll. It always surprises me how well it works. You look all grown up, Hermione, although let’s face it, those robes do nothing for you.”

As Sirius pulled Hermione from the mud, her footing slipped and she fell forward into him, every muddy, pissy, rodent holding bit of her. Instead of pulling back, Sirius straightened her upright, cracked a devastating smile, and laughed. 

“Looks like we both need a shower now, Doll. Your place or mine?” 

“Sirius Black, I do believe you are flirting with me?

“Thank Merlin, it’s been a long time since I’ve tried, and I wasn’t sure I was up to snuff.”

Hermione eyed him critically. There was so much she needed to know about the wizard standing in front of her, not the least of which was where he had been for the past ten years, but Hermione supposed there would be time for that later. 

Time for tea on the porch in the autumn.

Time for walks on the beach and hikes through the forest.

Time for weekends spent in bed surrounded by books and parchment and the really good Firewhisky. 

Because Hermione Granger was a hopeless romantic, and she looked absolutely wonderful in white. 


End file.
